Lifted, Falling, Spinning...

Lifted. When it comes to love, we are told that it gives us the feeling of either being lifted up high into the air, or it gives the feeling of falling. Either way, you aren't grounded, and you have no control over what is going to happen to you. After you have been lifted, you will automatically start to fall, and so you hope that there is somebody there to catch you. You hope to fall into the arms of the one you love, and that all will be safe and warm. But there's always a high risk you will fall to the ground, scrape your knees, and there will be no one to wipe your tears away. So if there is such a huge risk of being hurt, why do we let ourselves be lifted?

For the last few Sundays, me and Kade have taken the early bus to visit Bath, at the stop 5 minutes away from my house. It's about a 40 minute journey, and we'd always have something to laugh about on our way there. Our usual day consisted of going for lunch, walking around the shops, and enjoying and embracing the weather, despite what the weather might have been like that day...

Falling. The first time me and Kade went to Bath together, we went to a local garden. I had been seeing him casually for a couple of months now, and things were just starting to get serious. We walked peacefully around, laughing and joking as usual. It was this day, that I remember my first feeling with him, that I was spinning. After you are lifted, you fall, and if you land safely, you then start to spin. But although someone might have been there to catch you the first time, that person might not be ready to catch you for a second time.

In my case, when he kissed me, and my whole world began to spin, and I was luckily enough to keep my balance, and stay on my toes.

Spinning. In previous cases, you are sometimes to scared to spin around, because you are so afraid of falling. Should we embrace our spinning, and hope for the best, at the risk of falling down? What if we were to stay completely grounded. To stay sensible, and to not let our emotions overwhelm us? Not only is it not that easy, you then have a high chance of losing the best feeling that you ever had. Love.

Love is not like a roller-coaster, because with a roller-coaster, you start on the ground, you are lifted high into the air, thrown and spun around, but you always land safely on your feet, at the end. Love can never guarantee that you'll land safely, but its much more fun, and far more exciting than any roller-coaster you could ever ride on!

Potter Potty!

When it comes to Harry Potter, I was the girl at school, who was known for being "Potter Potty". I absolutely LOVED it! And I still do. But at school, I was obsessed! I remember being in a competition, in English. The competition consisted of choosing a personal subject you are most knowledgable in, writing down any words you could think of, associating with that subject, handing the list over to your teacher, and trying to remember everything you had written down, from that list. My chosen subject was of course, Harry Potter. And undoubtedly, I won! Along with being an extremely passionate person, I am also very competitive, so there was no way I could lose! ;)

I would also refer to my subjects by their Hogwarts class equivalent. Example; Chemistry would be refered to as "Potions", and P.E would be refered to as "Quidditch Practice". And one christmas, I even bought myself little christmas presents, wrapped them up, signed them from various Harry Potter characters, and put them under the christmas tree... Like I said!

I have chosen to use Harry Potter as my chosen topic for this particular post, because the day before yesterday, despite the last book (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows), being released a few years ago, I have only just finished reading it!

It seemed that I never found anytime to read it. But when that time finally came around, where Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Pt. 1, was being released in the cinemas, I was adamant to finish reading the book, before I saw the film. I made sure that I read up to where the first half of the film, was due to end, and then carried on with my slow reading, until the second half of the film was released.

HPATDH was released in cinemas last Friday, but it was today, I went to watch it! So knowing that today was going to be the day I watched Pt. 2, I have been indulging myself into the last few chapters, for the last week.

How wonderful it was to be absorbed straight back into the world of H.P, just like I had always been. I was absorbed, sucked in, and immediately regained the familiar feeing of it seeming as if I was right there with them. With the way that J.K Rowling wrote these books, it always made me feel this way, and I have yet to find another book, that does this so well as these books.

The day before yesterday, I finished the book. Yesterday, I watched HPATDH Pt.1 (what a mouth-full!), which totally got me in the mood to go to the cinema. Today, was the day of watching Pt. 2 in 3D...

This morning, I got dressed up in my black dress, and Gryffindor tie, and headed to Yeovil cinema, and when we got there, I even bought the slightly more expensive 3D glasses that were Potter shaped.

I sat watching the screen, absolutely fascinated! The film was fantastic! They did the best job they have ever done, matching the scenes in the film, accurately from the scenes in the book. Of course, they had to make a few minor adjustments, to ensure that the film was kept to a reasonable running time, but I do feel that they included every essential detail that was needed, to ensure that the final creation of the film, matched the exact image of the scenes Rowling planted into our minds, with such detailed writing.

I was on edge throughout, my eyes fixated upon the screen, and in tears by the credits, and I did not expect to be so impressed.

It was an emotional experience, as I knew it would be the last time I was to see a new Harry Potter film in the cinemas for the first time, again. It was the last time I was to be excited about seeing the next unseen film, when watching the previous film. And on Tuesday, when closing the book, on the last page, in the last book, I knew it would be the last time I ever had the feeling of the unknown, when it came to Harry Potter. I would never have that exciting feeling of the unknown again. But I know that I can always pick up one of the books again, and be taken back into the world that I, and so many others, would be unable to forget easily. A world where anything is possible when it comes to love. And a world where I could be reminded of the many adventures, dramas, and secrets, that are held within those pages. I could, once again relive my childhood memories, and when they're filled with such brilliant fantasies and surprises, there is nothing better than that!

"Oh, I Do Like To Be Besides The Seaside..."

"...Oh, I do like to be besides the seeeaaa!"

It's that time of year where us British folk take advantage of the hot and sunny weather we so rarely get! It's time to grab your beach bag, shades, bucket and spade, and take a trip to the local seaside!

This year, I have taken a couple of trips to the beach. Once to Devon, and another to Weston-Super-Mare. I am also planning on having as many more trips to the beach, as I can, this year. It's time to top up on my tan, and splash out in the sea, rather than splashing out on new clothes, which I seem to be doing to much of lately! Splashing in the sea; It's free, and so are the best things in life! :)

My first seaside trip took me to Paignton, in Devon.

Here sat with me, whilst waiting for my train, is my favourite little vintage-themed bag, that I bought for £6 from Primark, around Christmas time. It seems to go very well as part of the train station/ traveling image I have going on here.

I'm very lucky, to have a sister who lives by the sea, that needs a cat-sitter! I was able to enjoy a short breakaway to a place where the air smelt like salt, and the feeling of the sand in between your toes, was only a few footsteps away...

Although the weather wasn't great whilst I was staying over there, (in fact it rained for most of the time!) we did catch a few rays of sunshine. I managed to take some nice photos, and in the photo above, I am wearing my favourite Topshop playsuit. I bought this last year for £50, which was pricey, but beautiful nonetheless. I paired this with a Tommy Hillfigger sleeveless shirt, that my mum bought for me from a charity shop for £5! You've got to love charity shops!

My travels then took me to the town of Weston-Super-Mare, a week later. This was a lovely hot day, where I spent most of my time sat on the beach with my brother, eating fish and chips, ice cream, and fudge. All seaside essentials, in my opinion!

Below, a picture of myself and my mum, wearing my favourite playsuit, again! Something I live in during summertime, more than my bikini!

Stay with me a little longer, sunshine! I'm not ready to say goodbye yet...

Ibiza 2011!

There is one thing, that I think nearly every person out there, has in common with one another. It's the one sentence that takes you back to some of your fondest memories... "There's nothing like a week away!" And how true that statement is!

The day before I flew out for my week away, I was sat in a local cafe, treating myself to lunch, when I overheard a conversation in the corner, between two elderly ladies...

"There's nothing like a week away", one of them stated, as the other agreed, whilst sipping lattes. And as I watched, and listened to these two old ladies reminiscing, it reminded me that there really isn't anything like a week away! It's a chance to get away from the usual routine of going to a job you probably (lets face it), despise. A chance to and escape the constant money worries you desperately try to resolve, only to be left with more after you get back. But you figure "Hey! It's  worth it, isn't it?!"

My week away consisted of going to one of my favourite places in the world, Playa Den Bossa, in Ibiza! And although Ibiza is the clubbing capital of the world, we didn't go there so much for the clubbing scene, but for more to chill under the sun of the euphoric atmosphere.

Now before I start to tell you about my week away, I preach on a different note; I have been a terrible blogger! I would have been back 2 weeks tomorrow, and I am only just writing about my time away! Plus the fact that I haven't blogged for nearly 2 months! It's a crime, I'm guilty, and I'm sorry... However, now that I have confessed my sins, and do hope to be forgiven, I plan to fill you in on how my week away went down...

Ibiza greeted me with it's usual "warm welcome", as I stepped off the plane, and the breezy air swept back my hair.

After we had got to our hotel and unpacked, we grabbed a quick bite to eat. I was then immediately soaking up the sun on the nearest sun bed, and dipping my feet into the bluest waters I've ever seen. It wasn't long before me and Kade were off exploring, and I was showing him the beach I was located at, on my last stay.

In the evening, we went to a familiar restaurant for dinner, and then to my favourite bar, "Murphy's". There is a band there that play every year, who I had met the previous Ibiza visit, and I was welcomed back by hugs and free shots, "Yes please!" We partied until the early hours of the morning, and slept until the afternoon. I know I said we didn't go for the clubbing scene, but we really didn't!

The next day, we explored some more, and found another part of the beach, that wasn't so full of tourists. It was where most of the locals liked to stay, so this felt more cultural.

We discovered a great chill out bar/ restaurant called Fusion, where we spent most of our evenings, arriving just in time for happy hour, and drinking some of the most delicious cocktails I've ever tasted!

In the day, we spent most of our time at the beach, and exploring new areas. It was what I had done the previous years, and what I had done this year, but it could never get boring for me! There has always been somewhere great to go to, so many lovely new people to meet, and so many amazing sights to see.

On our last day, we went to Aguama, the local water park, where we had been on our previous years also, and despite there being a thunderstorm, it hasn't let us down yet! We had our usual picture taken outside Aguama.

I have many places I want to travel to, such as Thailand, various parts of America, and Australia, (to name a few), but I always hope that Ibiza will be a place I return to. I could never get bored of paradise... <3

Easter Time..

So, it seems that the topic of this post is a little "past it's sell-by date", but...
1) So is the hot cross bun I just ate, and that was still good,
And...
2) We have only just hit May, and I'm pretty sure we've all still got the bank holiday fever, due to the very many there have been lately...
So I thought, "what the hell"?!


Anyone who knows me well enough, will know that there are two holidays I celebrate more than any other, every year... and yes people! That means more than Christmas too... And that's Easter, and Halloween. I believe in the original beliefs, when it comes to holidays, and that's the Pagan beliefs.


Easter: Celebrating Life!

The very well known symbol of Easter is the egg. This represents life, and fertility.


The Easter bunny originated from the theory that whenever the moon was a full, the Pagan Goddess would like to transform into a hare, and run through the forests, to look up at the moon, and bathe in the bright light than beamed down...


Hot cross buns however, have 2 pagan theories. Some say that the point of the cross was to ward off any evil spirits, and others say that it represents the four quarters of the moon. (I prefer this theory too!)


Halloween: Celebrating Death!

This is a picture of me last Halloween, with a random cat we found walking the streets, and my friend Sean too (I think you can just about make him out in the background...)


Now, I'm sure a lot of people, when reading that pagans celebrate death, will think things such as... "Why would you celebrate death?" or/and "Probably because they enjoyed the element of death." No. Halloween is there to celebrate death, in the way that it is accepted that death is indeed a part of life, and has to happen to everyone, and everything, and should be celebrated. Although life does go on. A dead tree that has fallen to the ground, will be covered in the growth of moss. And no one ever really dies, as long as there memory is lived on through the memories of the living... So, on the night of Halloween, people will celebrate the memories of the lives once lived by the now deceased, by dressing up in their scariest masks and costumes, to frighten away evil spirits, and face their personal demons, by raising a glass! A lot of people also choose to spend their evenings doing scarier things like telling ghost stories, watching scary films, or even choosing to visit a haunted house, as this too, is another way of facing your fears, and scaring them away. And death, although a natural cause, can indeed be bloody scary!


Here's another picture from Halloween last year, but of how I decorated my living room...

So, this Easter, I decorated my front room with a home-made tree of life. I found a dead mini christmas tree from a few years ago, and stuck it in a pot. I decorated it with little hanging eggs, and I put some coloured shredded paper in the bottom of the pot, to give it an extra boost of colour. (I told you that life goes on!) This was rested around the bottom of my fireplace, and brightened the living room up straight away! There were also some yellow flowers in a vase on my window sill.


Friday 22nd April: A Good Go Karting Friday!

(Me and Kade)


Myself, my boyfriend Kade, my brother, and a few friends of friends, decided to take a trip to the local race track. I, of course being the only girl, came last in the second race, but won the first, as I beat my brother...Victory is mine! ...But this was certainly a good way to celebrate your life, by living it in an extreme way, and racing your heart out, against many other boisterous boys, as they over take you...


Do something daring to celebrate living. Maybe one easter I will sky-dive, or swim with sharks when I have a fear of them!


Later that evening, me and Kade went for a meal, and enjoyed our favourite wine with it. A perfect end to the day.


Saturday 23rd April: The Feaster Easter Saturday!

I decorated the dinner table, with confetti, and laid out various easter foods, such as hot cross buns, easter biscuits, mini eggs, and other nibbles. I made home-made cocktails, and invited a couple of friends over, for the celebration. We ate, drank, sang songs, and laughed a lot, until late.
Here is a picture of my friend Sean, myself, and Kade, on top of my shed roof. A fond memory...

On Sunday, I made a mini Easter Egg hunt for Kade and my brother, and we all ate a lot of chocolate... and then again on Monday... and also on Tuesday, where I finished my easter bunny, which had my name written on it, bought for me, from Kade :) We sat by the moat, and just relaxed as we watched the swans, and spoke about various things, including the topic of the homeless man, who was sitting near us, laughing to himself, as he watched a family enjoying their easter...

A Fallen Angel...

There's something very mysterious about a woman with her back to the rest of the world, and her eyes fixated on the ocean. Sinking her toes deep into the cool sand, and just thinking to herself...

In my case however, it was not the ocean, but the moat in the small city I lived in, and it wasn't as peaceful as the ocean. People continued to walk in front of me, blocking my view, interrupting my private time. A group of girls swearing and insulting each other, whilst pushing a stolen super market trolley, for example.

Something new had distracted them... An old man that had appeared around town last summer, who liked to make up poetry on the spot, and dictate it to the youngsters, had tried to spark up a conversation with the girls... The girls surrounded him, calling themselves rude names, referring to him as "mate", whilst a couple of much younger girls held hands with each other, and skipped past, "1,2,3,4" they chanted. The older girls stole the walking stick from the old man, and ran around with it. And then finally, decided to give it back to him, after they had finished using it, for whatever more important thing they were using it for... He then went on his way.

A blind lady perched herself and her two dogs on the wall next to me...

"There is always something going on", I thought to myself. This was a quote from the film "The Peaceful Warrior". As time flew straight past me, and my mind rushed back and forwards, I began to feel sad. Is our world being destroyed? Can we save it? Are there many people left, like me? I thought of the homeless man I had seen the day before, and I wondered if he was a fallen angel. Was he looking for the good in someone like me, who couldn't even find the good in herself to spare some change, just in case he was a fake? I wanted to, but instead I passed by, and thought, I'd do it later... A feather floated onto my finger...

I went and bought a pot of chamomile tea, from the coffee shop in town. After sitting there for a while, I saw him again. Entering through the glass doors in front of me, and carrying the blanket he usually wore around his cold shoulders for warmth, in a torn rucksack, on his back. He walked up to the counter. But still, I gave no change. He had enough for a coffee. I would feel silly giving him more money ...Although he could have used it towards an over-priced cake, that I had also bought myself 5 minutes earlier.

I sat there, in the comfy, leather chair, whilst I looked out of the window, at the rest of the world passing by, and I thought about why I was here. I wanted inspiration; towards a blog I was going to start writing again. Yet somehow, every time I thought about what I would plan to write about, I thought of him.

As the homeless man left the coffee shop, I watched his dirty, swollen feet walk in the sandals, that were only recently put there, as he was apparently not good enough to walk in shoes beforehand... He disappeared once again. I couldn’t help the feeling of wanting to cry. Were this man, and all of these people who surrounded me, here to tell me how shit life is, or to remind me of how good mine is?

There were people in purple t-shirts on the street, trying to stop others in their very busy tracks, only to be hushed away or ignored... I'll admit, I was usually one of those people, but today I stopped, and I spoke to one of them. She was working for a charity that helped to support deaf children. She told me their are roughly 45,000 deaf children in the UK... And all I could think about lately was how slow my Mac was running, and how all I wanted to do was get out of the house, who I had to share with my mum, who drank a tad too much, worked much too little, and constantly complained about not much worth complaining about. At least I can hear my own mother's voice, and at least I have a roof over my head, despite this household being a little dysfunctional...

I noticed the feather again. This time, resting on my left knee. And to my left, sat on the pavement across from me, there he was. I would give him change this time... When I left.

I discretely watched him for a while. Another man had chosen to stop in his tracks, and sit down beside him, and have, what looked like a deep conversation, with him... I took a picture, as I found it interesting.

I found myself being distracted by the sound of a laughing baby, being tickled by her mother, and smiling at me, as I smiled and waved back at her...

And I thought to myself, "there's so much beauty in the world, sometimes I can't stand it...", which is in fact another quote, and one of my favorites (to name a few!), from American Beauty... And strangely enough, for anyone who has seen the film, and will know what I am talking about, I had taken a picture of a boy the previous day, who had been chasing a plastic bag around, that had been dancing with the wind, whilst his grandmother laughed with him...

I think I'm finally beginning to see life for a hint of what it is... No matter what it is, It's certainly unique, and special, and you are incredibly lucky to have one...

I planned to leave the coffee shop, and give the homeless man the change I had left in my purse. I decided on this, after I had heard a man complaining about the speed of his laptop, who I couldn't help being slightly irritated by, before he walked outside to "slowly kill himself" as he put it, whilst he lit up a cigarette...

After they had gone, I walked across the street, and gave the homeless man the money that I had been longing to give him. He thanked me with a well-spoken accent of irony, as I smiled at him, and walked away.

I am glad to say that I didn't have a feeling of relief, from finally getting rid of the guilt; I had felt before I gave him the change. Instead I felt nothing. It wasn't a feeling of emptiness, nor was it a feeling of a hole once empty, now being filled. This nothingness instead left me with a question. A question my R.E teacher once asked the class years ago, that always stuck in my memory from school...

"Can anyone ever really commit an unselfish act?"

For example, if you were to say yes, and then give an example of a supposedly unselfish act, of how you did something for somebody, that didn't benefit you in any way, there would be an argument. The argument would be that by doing this, despite it not benefitting yourself in the obvious way, you were still benefitting from it in the way that you were being left with some sort of sense of achievement, or satisfaction, because you were happy to do the good deed. So therefore, you were getting something out of it. But as I felt nothing, had I committed a truly unselfish act? I wasn't asking myself this question to feel better about myself, I was merely curious...

But the main thing I remember thinking was how I had been inspired to write my first blog post, by a homeless man, and how I would feel almost hypocritical, if I were to ever post anything, about something less important than this subject, in the future. Such as, the clothes I like to wear, or the things I wish to have. But if blogging about something you feel passionate towards, despite the difference in importance, or relevance, is hypocritical, then so be it! This is me. These are my thoughts, my feelings, and my passions. This is my blog.